


Stanuary 2020 Week 2: Secrets

by redwoodroots



Series: Stanuary 2020 [2]
Category: Gravity Falls
Genre: SECRET TUNNELLLLL, Secrets, Stanuary 2020, Teenage Pines, Week 2, and romance novels, and secrets, jk, well actually there is a secret tunnel
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-01-29
Updated: 2020-01-29
Packaged: 2021-02-27 10:02:36
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,498
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22461568
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/redwoodroots/pseuds/redwoodroots
Summary: To shake off Crampelter, Stan takes Ford to a secret tunnel - which leads to Ford's discovery of Stanley's secret love for romance novels.
Series: Stanuary 2020 [2]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1616200
Comments: 14
Kudos: 56





	Stanuary 2020 Week 2: Secrets

**Author's Note:**

> TW: Bullying

“He’s catching up!” Ford panted. 

“So run faster!” 

“He’s on a bike and I have skinny noodle legs!” 

“Fair point!” 

They raced down the sidewalk, but Ford was tiring fast and Stan could hear Crampelter’s bike screech around the corner behind them. To the right was a grassy park – a nice wide open space with nowhere to hide – and to the left was Viewpoint Point, a small cliff that jutted out of the sand with a rotted pier crumbling from its tip. The base was eroded into huge piles of rocks and boulders. Stan grabbed Ford’s arm and sprinted toward it, kicking up sand in his wake. 

“Where are we going?” Ford gasped. 

“Where a bike can’t follow us!” 

“HEY PINES FREAKS!” 

Stan glanced over his shoulder. Crampelter had stopped his bike and had a BB gun levelled at their backs, a couple of actual rockets attached to the front. 

“My rockets!” Ford cried. 

“You can have ‘em back!” Crampelter shouted, and he fired. 

He wasn’t aiming to hit them, but it exploded in the sand right behind them and the shockwave knocked them flat. 

“The heck did you load those with?” Stan gasped. 

“He’s reloading, he’s reloading!” 

Stan cursed, made a split-second decision, then grabbed Ford’s arm and took off toward the cliff. He heard a shrill whistle and dove right just in time to avoid another rocket. Then, still gripping Ford’s arm tightly, he started scrambling over the rocks at the base of the cliff. 

“Where are we going?” Ford wheezed. 

Stan didn’t answer, just pulled Ford behind him and slowly backed up. They were balanced rather precariously over two very large boulders, and their backs were pressed to the wall of the cliff. Crampelter grinned, reloaded, and fired. The second the rocket sent up a cover of sand, Stan shoved Ford into a gap between the rocks and dove in after him. 

He landed with a face in his elbow and a knee in his gut. He grunted and rolled off his brother, both of them breathing hard. After a minute Stan’s eyes adjusted to the light from the crevice above them. They were in a small pocket in the cliff, about the size of the Pawn Shop, and there was an opening a few feet away that led down a dark tunnel. Stan gave his brother a quick glance, but he was holding himself okay and it didn’t look like he’d sprained anything from the fall. 

“You okay?” Stan asked. 

“I – yeah, yeah. Where are we?” 

“Cave.” 

“I can see that,” Ford said, slightly annoyed. “I meant where –”

“Hey!” Crampelter called overhead. Immediately Ford fell back behind Stan. “You stupid losers, did you run away like a couple of cowards?” 

_Yeah, cuz we don’t wanna get blown up by bad aim,_ Stan thought sourly. He motioned for Ford to head for the tunnel. Ford grimaced but got up quietly and followed, hooking one hand around Stan’s arm and reaching out with the other to feel for the wall. Stan did the same, leading them slowly forward until Crampelter’s voice faded and they were lost in inky blackness. 

“He’s gonna block the entrance, isn’t he,” Ford sighed. 

“Nah. It’s really well hidden. You didn’t even notice when you were standing right over it.” 

“I had a rocket pointed at my face,” he said drily. “Also, how did _you_ know this was here?” 

“Uh…I mean I had to hide somewhere when Pops thought I stole his vinyl collection, right?” 

“But how did you – hey!”

“It’s okay!” Stan said quickly. The tunnel of the wall had suddenly veered away from them, and Stan quickly turned left so they could keep following it. They’d reached the big cavern, he’d have to be careful where he led Ford from here. “There. Find the wall? It’s just a pocket in the cliff. The tunnel keeps going in about ten feet, Nothing to see here.” 

“Ugh. Hang on, let me get my flashlight.” 

“What? No, wait –”

Too late. Ford clicked it on. His jaw dropped and Stan let out a groan. 

This cavern was about the same size as the first, but it held a small cooler, a small electric lantern and stacks and stacks of books. There were so many it looked like a miniature city. 

Ford looked around, bewildered. “Where did all these books come from?” 

“No idea!” Stan said brightly. “Welp, guess the place is haunted by a librarian, we better go before we run out of oxygen or it traps us here for all eternity!” 

But Ford was already picking up a book. “This is Ma’s book,” he said slowly. “She tossed it ages ago. And that one, and that one – Stan, did you bring all of these down here?” 

He cringed. “N-no! Maybe! Because they were so horrible I couldn’t let them see the light of day again!” 

“There are toffee crumbs in this one on page 57,” Ford said. “Stan, are you _reading romance novels?_ ” 

“Don’t tell Pa,” he begged. 

“Did you read _all_ of these?!”

“I read them when Ma throws them out. Don’t tell her either,” Stan said. “Don’t tell anyone, okay? They’re just – research! For getting good at flirting and stuff! I mean, a mug like mine, I’m gonna have honeys dripping off each arm. Gotta be prepared, right? Am I right?”

Ford stared at him. 

Sweat broke over Stan’s face. “What? _What?_ Say something already!” 

“Romances.”

“Flirt research!” 

“With pink covers.” 

“They have cowboys!” 

“ _Dozens of them._ ” 

“I –”

“I can’t believe this!” Ford’s face split into a huge grin. “You’ve secretly been a bookworm too? This whole time!?” 

“Hey, easy with the insults!” Stan protested. 

Ford just laughed and punched him in the arm. “Stan, this is fantastic! We can hide all our stuff down here instead of in the ship where Crampelter can get it. We can come down here to read whenever we want!” 

“You’re not…grossed out?”

“Are you kidding!?” Ford swung an arm around Stan’s neck and yanked him down for a noogie. He had the upper body strength of sea lettuce, but Stan ducked down obligingly and laughed when Ford messed up his hair. “My brother the bookworm!” Ford shouted happily. “Bookworm Buddies for life!” 

“Get off already,” Stan grumbled, beat red and grinning. “You’re just obsessed with anything book-shaped, aren’t you. These are actual lady romance novels, you know.” 

“Yeah, I know! How many have you read? Which ones are your favorites? You got any supernatural ones? Oh! There’s some romance in Dracula, have you read that yet? Although it’s kind of a slow start. Oh wait, have you read –”

“Dude, Dracula’s a book?” 

“ _I HAVE SO MUCH TO SHOW YOU!_ ” 

Ford grabbed Stan’s hand and started pulling him towards the entrance, but Stan blanched and dug in his heels. 

“Whoa, hang on a second!” 

“What? Don’t worry, the librarian banned you but we can still use my library card! I’ll even pay the fines if you ruin the books again!”

“That was Pete the Seagull’s fault,” Stan said sharply. “Not my fault he thought the picture of bread on the cover was real.”

“Who cares? C’mon! You said the tunnel keeps going, right? Let’s go to the library right now!” 

“Whoa whoa whoa!” Stan yanked his hand away. “Seriously, Ford, no.” 

“Why not?” 

“Because Crampelter’s out their with your rockets – nice job keeping track of those, by the way – and I don’t want him or anyone else to catch me carrying books around. Your books, sure, but not these books. Imagine what Pops would say.” 

Ford winced. 

“Exactly.”

“Well you could have told _me_ ,” Ford said indignantly. “I mean you had a whole secret cave down here and you never told me about it! How did you even find it in the first place?” 

“It’s connected to that chamber where we found the Stan O’ War. And the only reason I didn’t tell you is because you got really obvious tells.” 

“I do not!” 

“Dude, your eye is twitching right now.”

“Oh…” 

Stan shifted awkwardly. “It’s fine. I just…I don’t want anyone else to know I like weird gooey romance stuff.” 

Ford cracked a grin. “Stan, you’re talking to the resident expert on weird.” 

“You’re really not grossed out?” 

“I’m grossed out that some of these books smell like bad pizza cheese, but that’s about it. Oh, and you owe me for keeping the cave a secret.” 

“I just saved your skinny butt from Crampelter!”

“And!” Ford said, striding towards the exit tunnel. “We still need to head to the library. I check out stuff like Dracula all the time, so no one will find it odd, and it has romance and adventure and even a ship, plus we can come back here and read it, assuming no one spots us going in through the main chamber –”

“See if I save you from your own science ever again,” Stan muttered, but he was grinning as he followed his brother down the tunnel.

**Author's Note:**

> You can't look me in the eye after watching "The Inconveniencing" and tell me Stan wouldn't have liked a good romance novel. Especially ones with strong female protagonists and dancing.
> 
> For the record, literally anyone can like romance - any kind of romance. Stan's desire to keep it a secret stems from mainstream toxic masculinity and Filbrick, whose solution to bullying is to push Stan to beat up the bully in boxing, and is a pretty good example of teaching toxic masculinity. 
> 
> Ford doesn't care about that, and neither should you or anyone else. *Yeets toxic gender conformity straight out the window*
> 
> Also we have fanart now!!! Or should I say STANART?? GO YELL AT [CAFFEINE-ADDICTI0N](https://caffeine-addicti0n.tumblr.com/post/190544601492/i-was-inspired-to-make-this-by-this-absolutely) AND TELL THEM HOW GREAT THEY ARE!!!


End file.
